Dear Xander and Nick,
What I have really wanted to tell you boys is this:
I haven't regretted anything, really, in my life. I have always gone after the things that were important to me. I have been blessed with a wonderful husband and children. There are a few things I am so embarrassed about that I wish they had never happened...sort of. One of those bad mistakes helped me get to know your father, so I can't regret that.
I have been full of fear. It holds me back and it is a bad way to live life. I hope that you can escape from the bonds of fear in your lives.
I believe you are both good-looking, smart, talented, sweet, determined, loving, and funny. I'm your mom so you may roll your eyes but I want you to know beyond a doubt that's what I think. I will love you forever no matter what happens in our lives. Even if we make mistakes. We will make mistakes, but we will get through them okay.
I hope that you go after what you want in life and that you don't stop until you get it...but only for the really, truly important things. I hope you stay open to people. We are all humans and so very similar to each other. I hope you have joy in your lives and I really want you to be happy most of the time. Most people don't get to be happy as much as their parents wish they could be, but that's okay. We make it anyway.
I just love you. Thank you for bringing real meaning and love and joy and contentment into my life. I thank your father for the same things.
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